A Thimble Full Of Therapy(what I’ve learned in 50 years)

Be kind, absolutely,
But set boundaries,
Love, but don’t be so
Damned eager to please.

Homicidal Cat

My cat may be trying to kill me.
I was lying there in bed,
When all of a sudden,
The reading lamp landed,
Inches from my head.
Could it be revenge you seek,
For visiting the vet last week?
More likely you want,
Your food increased.
But how am I supposed,
To feed you,
If I’m lying here deceased?

Further Considerations On The Effects Of A Cashless Society

“NOTICE: The Tooth Fairy’s operations have been modernized and optimized like everything else, and will no longer deal in cash. This is an official receipt to tell you the amount of _______ has been deposited in your mother’s bank account. You may demand it of her at your earliest convenience. Don’t forget to brush.”
–Respectfully, T.Fairy.

BUS

The questions seem just so essential,
On thoughts and matters existential.
Who are we? Why me? What’ s the fuss?
And really, will I catch my bus?

Folded Paper

Origami Kitten – I have folded myself.

In the beginning,
There’s a two-dimensional,
Perfectly smooth square.
Beautifully flawless,
And pristine.
Then, creation.
The first fold comes,
And it’s no longer perfect.
Creases can be smoothed
And flattened,
But they are permanent.
A skilled folder’s hands,
Add three-dimensionality,
And tiny defects,
Which give it personality,
And uniqueness.
More folds and more creases.
Then, complexity.
Only the folder knows,
When what was once,
Flat and without form,
Is finished.
Able to stand on its own.
Origami is a meditation.
One wonders things,
Like whether we are folded paper,
Creased by Natural Selection,
Until we are so complex,
Our creases can’t be counted.
How many of us ended up,
In the cosmic waste basket?

BODY WARS

Seems my body cannot
Always do what it pleases
One part starts to pee
While another part sneezes
The bottom part’s flowing
When the top part achoos
Which makes the flow stop
I’ve no way to choose
Then the sneezing pauses
And the peeing resumes
Till I’m sneezing again
And the cycle consumes
Every muscle I have
In pure wrenching stress
And furthermore
Leaves my bathroom a mess!

Chocolate Bunnies and Jesus

It’s the Feast of Fertile Springtime Day,
The end to Lenten fasting day.
The “Oh My! Jesus Came Back!” day.
The plastic grass and basket day.
The headless chocolate bunny day.
The white eggs just won’t cut it day.
So with all that in mind, I say,
Have a Happy Zombie Jesus,
Chocolate Bunny Decapitation,
Drunken Blindfolded,
Pagan Fertility Orgy Day.
(In other words, Happy Easter.)

The Importance of Eves

The day right before a big holiday,
Is a very important one for Swedes.
That’s when the party gets underway,
And the next day is what a Swede needs.
Because of the usual hangover,
From the party the evening before,
A Swede needs a day to recover.
That’s what the holiday is, nothing more.

Yeah, I Know….

I’m overweight. Simple as that.
Short and round, and sorta fat.
Oh yeah, I know I’m not obese,
I can usually see my knees,
But I don’t feel good,
As most things go,
And don’t need you to tell me so,
For truth is I’m really quite aware,
I’ve got at least one tire to spare,
So I don’t say this to chastise,
I just think perhaps it’s wise,
To leave your judgement on the shelf,
For truth is I already hate myself.