Advice to my nephew turning 30

Thought I’d write some words of wisdom,
But I couldn’t get them to come,
Nonetheless I’m writing this to you,
As it is with that old adage,
Thirty is a rite of passage,
So I’ve jotted down some stuff to get you through,
You’ll be fine, but time will tell,
If no one saw, you never fell,
Karma’s a bitch, but just as well,
For if you scratch an itch, it just might swell,
If it’s what it is, it was meant to be,
But perception is reality,
Half-full or empty’s not the gig,
The problem is your cup’s too big,
Just be yourself, I share your pain,
Don’t bring a towel into the rain,
Knuckle down, it’s not rocket science,
Revolt, or consider compliance,
Doesn’t matter either way,
Tomorrow’s still another day,
In the big picture, we’re all just squat,
A little bit of cosmic snot,
Trouble’s not worth a hill of beans,
Oh,
And don’t forget to eat your greens.

To the Graduating Class of 2011

Why should you listen to what I say?
I’m not that important anyway.
Who am I to tell all of you,
What you should or should not do?

I should probably give you some advice,
Like maybe use sunscreen once or twice.
But I know you’d soon forget it,
(Though, if you do you may regret it…)

Words of inspiration are hard to find.
They’re buried deep within my mind.
Our emotions are deep and elemental,
And words are merely sentimental.

They do not express the way I feel,
And cannot make the feelings real.
But the things that you don’t know about,
You’ll soon have that all figured out.

Still, you’ve heard all of this before,
So I don’t really need to talk anymore.
Your time here ends, and with any luck,
You won’t look back and think it sucked.