My Box of Ignorance

Despite all the pain I left behind,
Every now and then you cross my mind.
Yet, these thoughts aren’t the unwelcome kind.

I feel neither hatred, nor bitterness anew.
I’ve got far better things to do,
Than waste my time and energy on hating you.

I wonder if you’ve changed or are just the same?
Still burning in the fire of Jealousy’s flame.
And committing selfish acts in its spiteful name.

When first we met what laughs we had!
Yes, you were a bit controlling but not that bad,
And the happy times far outnumbered the sad.

Yet, over the years your jealousy became a curse.
And your controlling nature just got worse and worse.
Your selfish arrogance more difficult to disperse.

And despite the abuse increasing more and more,
And all the other women that I chose to ignore,
I tolerated it and stayed because that’s what I was for.

And because that was box that my life was in.
When I went inside, I was cut off from the pain.
Once I was safe inside, no need to come out again.

But you didn’t keep me prisoner in that box, I did.
From all the looks and all the words of pity, there I hid.
And then one day I cautiously opened up the lid.

I saw a world out there without you at its center.
At first it seemed more or less impossible to enter.
For I had all of your wants and requirements to tend to.

But then I started looking outside that box more often.
And eventually my resolve to stay in there began to soften.
Until one day I realized that my box was now my coffin.

Something is very wrong, I said, something is amiss.
I think my life was meant to be so much more than this.
So I stepped outside and left behind my box of ignorance.

14 thoughts on “My Box of Ignorance

    • Thank you so much! It only took ten years to get out of it. 🙂 I feel that this piece ends sort of abruptly but if I went on to explain what happened next it would take many volumes. Suffice it to say that everything worked out. 🙂 I emerged damaged but not irreparable.

  1. I really like the realization in this, especially the box to coffin image. Though, I gotta say, the rhyming scheme felt a bit wonky or too light for the piece.

    • I can definitely see how you got that impression. Actually I began the piece intending it to be pretty light-hearted,”I sometimes think of you, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.” But then it sort of got more and more heavy, but I had to continue with the rhyming scheme.

  2. I can relate to the woman in a box imagery, and I like the transformation to a coffin. Try scaring yourself with your imagery; I think you have it inside you, and I would love to read more of your work. Good job!

English, motherfucker, do you speak it? J/K - it's ok if you don't.

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