Some advice would be so nice.
I could really do with some,
About what to do when the,

Jehovah’s Witnesses come.
They always come in pairs,
In order to outnumber you.

And catch you off your guard,
Big smiles for disarming you.
All politeness: “Excuse me, Ma’am.”

But have you heard the Message?
The Good News about God’s plan,
For you, nothing to fear.

It’s all written down, in
This convenient pamphlet here.”
Since they really are polite,

It seems wrong, a disgrace,
To tell them to piss off.
Shut the door in their faces.

Their eyes and smiles so wide,
Sorry, but your little faith is
Much too small for God to fit inside.