You never once,
Raised your voice to me.
Never belittled me,
Nor humiliated,
Nor hit me.
You never even seemed to get angry.
It sounds wonderful, doesn’t it?
After ten years with an abuser,
I should be thrilled,
To never get yelled at,
Nor controlled.
But, you were the opposite,
Swing of the pendulum.
He was possessive.
You were simply unconcerned.
Devoid of all passion.
And despite all pain he gave me,
It was still better,
Than your indifference.

Folds Of Grey

Dark shadows coming from the light
From one I trust,
It isn’t right to feel this way,
My memories wrapped in folds of grey,
Forbidden, hidden deep within
Guilt embedded in my skin
Lay buried there deep in my soul
For I believed I played a role
All those years ago
My innocence defiled
Your loyal, reponsible child,
Lived with years and seeds of doubt
Till finally the truth came out,
An unexpected voice let it be known,
It was not just me,
I was not alone,
He too has lived a lifetime spanned,
With ripples from your probing hand,
I was shaped and formed,
You bent my will,
With your own damaged needs to fill,
Now finally time turns around,
With answers not sure I wish I’d found,
And the facts just lay there,
Like a steel crutch,
Shattered remnants of a mother’s touch.