COVID-19 Quarantine: Bored Cat Edition

>~.~< A photo essay >~.~<

For some reason that escapes me, my humans are home all the time now. I come and go as I please, as usual, but they remain inside. It is unnerving. They spend an inordinate amount of time staring into their large screens while moving their fingers across the keyboard massage devices. They seem to have lost their will to live. When I attempt to comfort them by occupying the spaces in front of them, they shoo me away saying something about “needing to work.”
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They do occasionally show their appreciation for my efforts by laying open a large papery object. They only only pretend to be interested in it. I know the real purpose of it is to serve as a temporary bed.
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The female insists on following me into the water room, which perturbs me greatly. I would never dream of accompanying the humans when they occupy the room. Well, maybe once or twice. A day. And only when the door to the room is shut, since this signals their need for companionship. As I stare into the window to the water floor, I see only myself. The human points her screen at me and records this moment. She is amused. I am not.
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When I attempt to signal my desire for the closet to be opened, my human ignores my request. She is either stupid or just plain cruel.
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From the vantage point of the dining room table I am able to observe the magpies and crows pecking small insects from the garden. Their exuberance annoys me. I will console myself by destroying the floral arrangement on the table.
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Alas, the flowers are not real. There is no meaning in this world.
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The human continues to mock me with her screen. I manage to successfully communicate my annoyance. Thankfully, my humans do understand ear language. I can no longer remain in this house of lies.
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I signal my desire for the door to be opened, and the human does so. I hesitate in the doorway for the customary five seconds before proceeding. Now I shall seek out foreign invaders and run them off the property. My humans appreciate my efforts in this capacity, often calling me a “good kitty.”

This pleases me. I am a good kitty.

>~.~< The End >~.~<

Words, words, glorious words! Give me all of your words!

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