(I recently tried to leave FB, and lasted a whole week. This is my imaginary response from the FB Masters, to the tune of Barenaked Ladies “One Week”)

“It’s been one week since you looked at me,
Deactivated yourself cuz you were angry,
Writing letters like a drama queen,
Thought  your luddite ways better than FB,
In five days you were abstinent,
Friends all saying “I posted, hey did you see?”
It’s okay, we’ve seen it all before,
We know we’ve got you by the short-and-curlies,
Two more days and you were back again,
You lasted one week, brave attempt, don’t be surly,
We’ll work you back into our marketing,
But don’t worry we don’t expect you to be sorry……”