Welcome to the land that’s called Turkey,
With curbs that come up to your knee,
Where a gajillion dogs and cats run free,
With ruins from 200 A.D.,
Where you can buy a neon green Jack Daniels tee,
From salesmen who won’t let you be,
I say salesMEN deliberately,
For Turkey hides its femininity,
But not its palm or olive tree,
And the ficus back home that grows timidly,
In Turkey grows wild and strong and free,
What’s more?
Well they drive a little crazy,
And oddly enough,
There’s no good coffee!