Candlelight Vigils

You know what I fucking hate?  Candlelight vigils.  Not only is a gathering of people with candles a fire hazard, but they just don’t work.  I am particularly perplexed by people holding candlelight vigils for missing people.  I just read today that another young, attractive white woman went missing, and people have already scheduled a candlelight vigil for her.   People, instead of holding a fucking vigil, how about you form a search party instead or drive around the fucking neighborhood looking for her, seriously?  For Pete’s sake even putting up missing person posters on a lamp post is doing something!  Standing around with a damned candle is pointless.

I will admit that I can sort of understand a candlelight vigil for memorial purposes.  Say Princess Diana died and some idiot wants to stand outside and get hypothermia, that’s okay.  Nothing says I remember you like almost dying yourself.  I’m not going to do it, but to each their own.

Now if I ever go missing, I want all of you to be out there looking for me, and for the love of God, don’t stand around with fucking candles, okay?

7 thoughts on “Candlelight Vigils

  1. From a completely snarkastic perspective, I want to say: Missing mommy? Look in Governor LePage’s stomach.

    ’cause, you know, he looks like he has a healthy appetite.

    I feel terribly for this woman’s family, though. 😦

    • If that was Sharkette I would go bonkers, and I sure as hell wouldn’t be standing around with a candle. I’d be knocking on every door in the neighborhood.

  2. Thank goodness you are a survivalist so at least if you ever disappeared you would be able to find your way back home safely…even if you have to be a ninja to escape the baddies. If we do go looking for you we will carry a trevor baylis wind up torch, candles will not be in out inventory.

English, motherfucker, do you speak it? J/K - it's ok if you don't.

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