If you’ve the will and flexiblity,
Length and elasticity,
You might give autofellatio a try,
Though apart from curiosity,
And lack of spousal generosity,
I really fail to see the reason why,
The chance is very bad,
That you’ll be the best you’ve had,
You’re gonna have to face yourself and lie,
And even if things stay on track,
And you don’t screw up your back,
You’re quite likely to get shot in the eye.